Goodbye Palm Springs. For now.

Leaving at the crack of dawn tomorrow, and am having my usual pre-travel sleepless night, so thought I would do one last post from Palm Springs, as promised.

As all my Canadian bridge partners have gone, I have been playing with some new folks, and having a great time.  And herein lies a tale.  I generally speaking don't play bridge on Wednesdays at all, and called the club to see if anyone was looking for a partner.  They had someone, I came early, and met Eleanor.  Here's the thing; Eleanor is 103 years old.

(I am standing behind her here).  I took some other pictures so she wouldn't be embarrassed by the fuss....




Jamie is one of our directors.....

...as is Tom....

She walks upright, without cane or walker - and briskly too.  She is beautiful and charming.  And she plays a damn good game of bridge., being in full possession of every one of her marbles.  (She never got at ACBL number - that's the points thing - because she started too late, she thought, at 70!)  The whole thing was an incredibly uplifting experience.  I mean, I don't particularly want to live to be 103, but if I do, I want to be just like her!!!!

When I am not playing bridge, I am trying to take advantage of my few remaining pool days - have to make sure that tan lasts until I get back.  Even when it is 102 degrees out - and it has been this week - it is remarkably cool in the pool.  And even on those days when it is in triple digits, the mornings are glorious here, the evenings are balmy, and the nights are cool.

So, what else?  Finished my classes, or at least as much of them as I could.  I will for sure take more in the fall.  Not only are they interesting in and of themselves, I am actually starting to interact with both instructors and fellow-students.  Generally speaking, I don't have the patience to develop a sense of belonging to anything, but here is seems to be happening organically - at the classes, at bridge, at the gym, at zumba, in my complex.  No wonder I don't want to leave this season!

A final round of parties and dinners too.  I said goodbye to all the neighbors at the last Thursday pool party - most of them (although not all) are leaving for cooler climes as well.  And on Saturday, May 7, we had a belated Cinco de Mayo party at the complex as well.

It was really well attended for a party to late in the season, and I sadly said goodbye to the rest of the neighbors...

....and it seems like I was saying goodbye all week.  First, there was dinner with friends Art and Wally....

It was great to see them, but it didn't do much to allay my worries.  Art seems much older, and frail.  And I think Wally is just scared.  There are so many health (and financial and social and psychological) issues to navigate....

Have gotten to know Judi, from the gym (who is from Portland, and just happens to know the above mentioned Eleanor, who is also from Portland - yet another small world story) much better this season, and we had coffee this week at Koffee, downtown....

How's that for a coffee shop?  I had never been before, but will certainly go again if I am near downtown.  It is a fabulous hideaway in the middle of town.

Judi wanted me to meet her daughter and partner, who were coming in to town Saturday, so she invited me to dinner at her lovely home...

To complete the round of social events, I had a rematch of Scrabble and dinner at Geoff and Marvin's, more new additions to my social season.

And to top it off, the fauna are putting on an incredible display.  There are baby bunnies galore.  The coyote pups I have already mentioned.  The quail have a new brood.  And even the road runners have had two babies.  And they are all pretty cheeky, coming right up to the patio - even on the patio - to make sure I notice them.  Next season, I will certainly try for photos.  (Hey, maybe I can take a class on wildlife photography...)

And, of course, a final round of reading before the library books had to be returned.  For serious reading, I read War of Two by Sedgwick.  It was about the Hamilton/Burr duel, and fascinating.  Lighter fare was another Alexander McColl Smith book, this time from the 44 Scotland Street series.  His books are so gentle and lovely.  Finally, I found Donna Tartt (she of Goldfinch fame) had a much earlier novel called The Secret History.  It reminded me of The Magus, with a touch of The Great Gatsby thrown in.  But I was totally hooked, and spent much of the last days (and nights) wolfing it down.  (You can do that when you are retired.....)

So, in a few hours, I am off to Washington, D.C., where I am meeting Peter for a week of opera and museums, and then back to Vancouver.  I will be sans computer in Washington, but will write from Vancouver when I get there....

Ta ta for now.  

The season is almost over....

..... and I am unusually sad.  Usually by this time, I am ready to leave, but not this year.  I am not sure why.  I guess it is because I am becoming more and more connected here, meeting great people both at the gym and at bridge.

Two of the bridge guys invited me over to their place Monday last week for dinner and bridge, two of my favourite pasttimes....

Below, right, host John and "4th" John...

.....and second host James......

.....(I am going to have to do something about my picture taking.  I don't know how I made three such good looking guys look, well, not.  You will just have to use your collective imaginations...)

We had lots of laughs, and, I think, a good time was had by all.

The spring semester Osher courses started last week.  The cinema course is looking to be a disappointment.  The instructors recently seem to have been given license to be self indulgent, and I certainly didn't like this fellow's choice of film - a depressing Swedish film taking place in the early 1900's, where a stupid (albeit pretty) woman allows herself to be beaten, and almost killed, and impregnated 7 times, by a drunken lout of a hustand.....I mean, the cinematography was great, but really, not worth over 2 hours of angst.

The second part of America and Islam looks to be better.  Our first lecture included a U-Tube clip on the results of drone warfare (this guy really hates the CIA and Black Ops).  At any rate, it is beyond the usual echo-chamber of things we usually listen to....

Wednesday, I was on the way to Houston for a long planned opera outing.  Peter got in earlier than I, so I met him at the hotel (the Lancaster, right down the street from the Music Center) for a snack and a drink at the bar (soooo sophisticated.....)

Thursday, we made our usual pilgrimage to the Menil Gallery (including the Cy Twombley exhibit but passing this time on the Rothko Chapel)....

.....no pictures allowed in the gallery, but I loved this tree outside.....

In spite of the early curtain (6 P.M. - it is Wagner, after all), we had time for a nap, and an early dinner at Birraporetti's, a local Italian eatery on the way to the Music Hall.

Well, two thumbs down for the eatery, but two thumbs up for the performance of Sigfried.  The singers (Jay Hunter Morris as Sigfried, Rodell Rosel as Mime and Christine Goerke as Brunhilde)and the orchestra were superb.  The staging started off reasonably well (the first time I ever found Sigfried and Mime even reasonably likeable...) but deteriorated by the third act (for which I kept my eyes shut most of the time, and no, I wasn't sleeping).  But it is all about the music, after all, and that was glorious.

And I do like being able to walk home from the opera.  We are already plotting strategy for Gotterdamerung in Houston next year.

Friday, we headed for the Houston Fine Arts Museum.  It is a huge museum (I had never been....), and I only had two hours before having to head to the airport, but with Peter's guidance (he has been many times before), I made a start...

(...sorry, I could have sworn I rotated this picture....)

(You see how all things tie together... the above statue is a Brancusi, an artist about whom I saw a documentary film last week..)

In any event, it was a great little trip-let, and I arrived home safe and sound, thanks to a pick up at the airport from friend Michael, even though the plane was late.

More opera Saturday morning, this time the Metropolitan Opera in the movies, Strauss's Elektra, with Nina Stemma.  (Peter had seen in twice live in New York - I was green with envy).  It was fabulous - I might even go for the encore tonight).  Friend Geoff decided to come, and we had lunch after at Sherman's Deli down the street from the movie theater.  All in all, a great New York outing in Palm Springs.  I mean, really, the Met and the deli?  Really?

Sunday was a pool day ( I have to get as many as I can in - there won't be time for too many more), and Monday back to the gym, bridge and classes.  

What more can I add? Oh, yes, the reading list.  The library yielded some bad (Jewish Wisdom for Growing Older - glad I didn't pay for it...) and something good (The Queen of the Night - note the opera theme - by Alexander Chee (the book jacket contained a review by Hanya Yanagihara, who wrote A Little Life, which I read and highly praised just a few months ago - see what I mean about everything tying together....)

Peter lent me a book called Interpreting Wagner, by Treadwell, saying it was "a bit dense" but interesting.  So far, I don't think I have understood one complete paragraph.  But I will (I hope) persevere.

Another 10 days, and I am back to the north country.  Hopefully, one more post before I go....

In Memorium

Friend Hank had been planning to stop here on Sunday night, on his way from a wedding in Phoenix to home in San Francisco.

He arrived late, and so we headed for Trilusa (described recently in these pages) for starters and drinks and called it dinner.

Hank worked with and loved Carolyn and George as well, and we decided that Hank would stay over until Tuesday AM, and then we would drive to Northern California together for the funeral.

We did that - 9 hours of shared driving is not all that much - arriving in Jackson (yes, those Jacksons were everywhere) in time for dinner at Mel's Diner.....

....no, I am not making the Jackson part up - see the sign in back of Hank's head...

Friend Suzanne (Suzanne was my mentor in the Bank of America, and was quite close to Carolyn and George, seeing them frequently in recent years.)....

.....Suzanne is battling Stage IV cancer as well, but I thought she looked terrific, and was thrilled that she had made the drive up from San Francisco to give Carolyn some support.  (I think I have convinced her to do another road trip this summer to Vancouver - perhaps it was the promise of the best dim sum on the planet that clinched the deal!)

That's George on the monitor, looking just like George.

Some thoughts about the funeral.  There was an open casket.  I understand that this is done so that people can say their last goodbyes and get some "closure" (god, I hate that word).  I found it unsettling myself.  When David died - 10 years ago - the first thing I wanted to do was to get rid of all the evidence of his illness - the hoist to lift him to the wheelchair, the wheelchair itself, the special bed to prevent bed sores, the diapers, the ramps, all of it.  I wanted to remember David as he was, vibrant and alive and striding down the street like the conqueror of the world.  I didn't want to remember him as tired and frail.

George too was vibrant and funny and never still for a moment.  That is how I would like to remember him, not the old frail man lying in the casket.

The service itself was a reminder, if one was needed, that one never really knows anyone else.  Three of George's many grandchildren spoke, as did a daughter, and a member of the submariner group to which he belonged and the hospital where he volunteered.  All reflected a different side of George, and all were different from the George I knew.

When I was (purportedly) dying in the hospital in 1997, George happened to be working in Washington State.  He took the time to come across the border to visit, bringing a huge stuffed cat.  That cat, much to the chagrin of the nursing staff, never left my side until I left the hospital; indeed, I still have it (one of the stuffed animals that made the cull of downsizing last summer).  While he was there, he made me laugh so hard it hurt my (already sore) lungs.

That is the George I will remember.

Below, Hank in a sports jacket and tie....

It has been quite some time since I saw him so attired (since banking days, I think, or maybe the last family wedding) so I thought I would memorialize it.  Probably more such sitings in our future though; it is the season of our lives for funerals I think...

Immediately after the funeral, we headed back to San Francisco; Hank dropped me off at the airport, and I flew back to Palm Springs.  The flight was by way of Salt Lake City, but did have the benefit of being both cheap and uncrowded, and neighbor Michael was kind enough to pick me up from the airport (It's never too late to pick you up, Nora")...

So I was back in time for the gym, Zumba, the farmer's market and bridge on Thursday, an affirmation of life, you might say.  Bridge partner Alex is leaving to go back to Vancouver, so this was the last time we would play for a while (although we have arranged to play in Vancouver when I get back in May).Wish we could have played better - we weren't awful, but didn't make points either!

Friend Ken and I had arranged to meet for dinner on Thursday - we have hardly seen each other this season, for various reasons (his sadness at the loss of a good friend, diverging activities, etc.).  He had a new (to me) Mexican restaurant to share, Taqueria San Miguel....

It is, indeed, just like the taquerias in Mexico, and specializes in seafood.  Both the margaritas and the fish were superb, and it was good to catch up.

My friends Geoff and his partner Marvin had invited me to their lovely home on Friday afternoon for a retro afternoon......

....that (above), folks is a record player.  And, below, is a Victrola...

...note the crank handle on the right.  Both are in working order, and Geoff has records (including early acoustical - as opposed to electrical - records to play on them.  It was wonderful to hear Caruso and Chaliapin as they were originally heard.  I may just have to get me a Victrola (and the records to play on it), to go with my juke box.  And then, maybe a pinball machine.......

And to clinch the afternoon, we played Scrabble - live, on a board, and everything....

A wonderful afternoon, all in all.  One of the great things about the season has been getting to know these folks, and having them make me part of their lives.

To close up the week, bridge on Saturday morning with Cookie resulted in some points (we came in third overall in the room; finally - it has been a dry stretch - followed by an afternoon at the pool (I see another such afternoon in my future, after lunch today).

Finally, the reading goes on.  I did finish Not in God's Name.  I wish you guys would read it.  I would love to discuss it.  His solution?  The realization that a reading of the Bible shows that we are all brothers, and that there is no reason to fight - there are enough of God's blessings for everyone.  How he get's there though is fascinating, whether or you not you believe in God, or, for that matter, blessings, or that there is anyone left on the planet rational enough to listen.

Sacks, the author, referred to Victor Frankl, who was big in my crowd in the 80s, when everyone was searching for meaning.  So, I tried reading Victor Frankl's Search for Meaning, a biography.  Well, I don't know whether I thought I understood it in the 80s - I sure don't now.  So, that was tossed aside in favour of some light reading, Bruce Alexander's Murder on Grub Street, and Amitav Ghosh's Floor of Fire.  Finally, I just finished Javier Sierra's The Master of the Prado.  I think it was just one book to many, and I didn't have the patience - too much conspiracy theory, famous painters showing us the way to "the other side" through their paintings (thus avoiding the wrath of the Catholic church).

No, what I think I need now is some more movies..... 

.....something old, something new......

Back so soon?  Well, it helps that there has been a bit less frenetic activity this week.

First, some additional pictures from last week, contributed by friends for posting...

I have gotten heaps of accolades on the party.  I guess it will be back again by popular demand.  But maybe not next year.

So what have I been doing this week?  Well, there have been two opera opportunities, both at the movies.  On Monday evening there was an HD presentation of Berlioz' Faust from the Paris Opera.  This is not really an opera, but, rather, a series of vignettes on the general theme of....so, rather odd, but glorious music, and definitely worth seeing, especially as I had not seen it before.  And yesterday was the next-to-the-last Met opera simulcast, Roberto Deveroux, a Donizetti opera that is so rarely staged that as best as I can understand it, even the Met has not done it before.  Well, it was glorious, the music, the singing, the orchestra, the costumes, the sets, the staging, everything.  If you get a chance to see it, do.  But bring a handkerchief.....

There were the usual gym, zumba and bridge outings....

And one movie, Hello, My Name is Doris, with Sally Fields and Tyne Daly, among others.  It is supposed to be a comedy, about an older woman who falls for a younger - much, much younger - man.  I found it cringe making.  I didn't see it as a liberation from societal restraints.  I found it painful to watch someone making an ass of herself in order to try to grab some affection in her life.  I don't know how much that says about the movie or how much that says about me, and my inability to live life as large as I would have liked to, and making an ass of myself be damned.  But I was very sad - maybe even troubled...when I left the movie.....

This week was the start of the spring semester for the Osher classes (I will miss the end, as I am leaving the desert on May 16).  It was a week of "shorts", three hour seminars on Techie Talk, The Lost City of Atlantis, and My Beethoven (what a combination!).  All were quite informative in their different ways.  Atlantis, for example.  I don't think I have ever given it a minute's thought; now, well, I think there will be a few books on the subject in my future.  Upcoming full length courses include the second part of America and Islam, and another course on understanding movies.

Speaking of books, I left you last time with promises about sharing my current book list.  Nothing terribly intellectual this time, with two exceptions.  I read a few of Martha Grimes Richard Jury mysteries, and one "mystery" by Bruce Alexander, where the "mysteries" are investigated by a blind magistrate in England in the 19th century.  (I liked it well enough to get another out of the library Thursday.)  The first exception is The Fall of the Ottomans: The Great War in the Middle East.  Well, that is heavy going, not to mention depressing.  I think that will be a long term project.  The other exception is a book called Not in God's Name, by Rabbi Jonathan Sacks.  Wow.  It is an attempt to explain terror and killing in the name of god, and it is as good an explanation as I have ever read.  He promises to give a solution, but I haven't gotten there yet.  I think it is a "must read" for people looking for an answer to "why?".  I will try to remember to give you the answer next time.  Meanwhile, bless libraries, for confronting you with books you would ordinarily not read.

And the week ended with an abbreviated round of social events.  Thursday, I had dinner at Geoff and Tom's, probably the last I will see of them til I get back to Vancouver (where they also have a place - I can't say live, none of us live anywhere, or, better said, we all live everywhere).

Geoff has put the Palm Springs place on the market, the plan being to use the money tied up in real estate to travel instead.  A good plan, but meanwhile, we enjoyed the garden, the pool, the lights and the view, not to mention the barbeque.  And, for you scoffers, that is actually kale on my plate, and I actually ate it.  (However, if you put enough butter and garlic on anything it becomes edible.  I don't plan on making a habit of it!).  No really, it was a great dinner, and great conversation.  They are a valuable addition to my friendships here in the desert.

On Friday, I played bridge with Sandra, an old acquaintance but a new partner.  We retired to her place afterwards to lick our wounds (no, we didn't make any points, but, on the other hand, we didn't kill each other either.)  She has had a condo here since 1997, not too far from my place and very lovely.  (Sorry, I was too busy drinking her wine to take pictures.Next time.)

And finally, last night, another party at our complex, to celebrate jointly a number of recent (and upcoming) 80th birthdays.....

.....as you can see, the theme was Italian...

.....and Dick (one of celebrants) cooked up a great lasagna (antipasta, salads and garlic bread were contributed - there was enough garlic in the air to vanquish an army of vampiers...)

It was a great party.  I met a number of neighbors I had not met before, and, for a change, everyone dressed up for the occasion.  It was a great end to the week.

A few sad notes.  I found out from friend Hank that Bob Hyman, a former colleague from the Bank of America recently died.  And, closer to home, George, the long-time (33 years I am thinking?) husband and best friend of former colleague and friend Carolyn, died on Saturday at the age of 87, with Stage IV lymphoma.  Carolyn, is, of course, devastated.  I haven't seen them often in recent years (they lived in the boonies in Northern California), but we have always been in touch, and I have always been grateful for their ongoing support.  I am sorry it is my turn to provide the support, although I will happily do what I can.  I am shaken, though - too close.

And now that I have finished this post, I am off to the pool.  Not too many pool days left to work on that tan......